Couples Therapy: Nine Essential Methods

Couples Therapy – Using the Gottman Method:


Couples are often in distress when beginning to attend couples therapy.  Emotions can run high and passionately.  The goal of couples counselling is to better improve the nature of the relationship so that communication can occur that is productive and effective. In the end, couples will be better able to process their own exchanges and ways of interacting and that helps mange problems and build strengths.

The Gottman Method takes into account the nine essential aspects of relationships and targets those areas in a relationship to improve.  This is a structured and methodical approach that is based in years of research.

Building Love Maps in Couples Therapy

These are structured exercises that are designed for couples to change the spouses’ understanding, knowledge and awareness of each other’s inner world.  Couples learn how to better pay attention to how their partner experiences their day and ongoing events.

Shared Fondness and Admiration

These exercises can be a way couples move through time together and enhance how they prioritize time together. The intention of the exercises is to reconnect the couple with feelings of fondness and admiration.  The focus shifts and rekindles their past relationship qualities and bring these forward in time.

Turning Towards each other, Rather than away

This approach in couples therapy is designed to help couples engage and deepen their understanding of how to turn to each other when together.  It helps the couple to be more mindful and deliberate about seeking out meaningful connection and responses through the day.

Building Positive Perspective

A key part of couples counselling is to help create an atmosphere of approaching problem-solving in a positive and collaborative manner.  A marriage therapist can help a couple build tools for effective and timely ways to repair the inevitable times when misunderstanding and disagreements surface.

Manage Conflict through Healthy Couples Communication

Couples often benefit from having a number of tools to deal with conflict.  Much of these tools concentrate on slowing down emotional responses and building in communication tools and mechanisms that bridge gaps in misunderstanding.

Realize Life Dreams

Couples therapy helps people develop and utilize meaningful communication tools to learn about their partner’s dreams and aspirations.  The couple can finds ways in which to encourage and support those aspirations.

Creating Shared Meaning

Relationship counselling can help a couple to build skills to honestly and openly discuss each other’s  hopes and visions for themselves and the relationship.


Building trust is a cornerstone in relationship counselling.  This can help help your partner know you “have their back” and that he or she also has your best interests and welfare in mind.


And last but not least, commitment is at the heart of a healthy relationship.  Through couples therapy, you will believe that your life-long journey is alongside your partner, in good and bad, and knowing that in the bad, you will act to improve things.

Next Steps:

Finding the right couples counsellor is an important first step.  At Waypoint, we are dedicated to ensure you have the best “fit” between you, your partner and your counsellor so that meaningful work can begin to improve your relationship.  Have a look at our team members to select the right counsellor for you and your partner. Don’t know who to select?  Contact us and we will help narrow down your search. The best fit is a strong determining factor in successful outcomes.  We will match you with a counsellor who you can meet with for a complimentary 30 minutes to see if the “fit” feels right for you.

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